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2009-09-30 |
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Quiz All Hippies - 30/9/9 |
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By: T-Dawgz 99.mpeg |
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What's up party people?
Wednesday arrives like Kanye West to an awards ceremony - Prada-sneakers-first out the side of a limo, cracking a fat at his twin reflections in the sunglasses of his entirely redundant bodyguards, while everyone else just wishes he'd fuck off as quickly as possible. Wednesday is also a fan of Beyonce. But enough about Wednesday and his ludicrous fucking sunglasses. This quiz is all about YOU, so let's take a look at YOUR answers for LAST WEEK.
1- Two thirds of China's organ donations come from death row inmates. 1,718 were killed in 2008 alone, so I guess that's quite a lot of body parts from people who were cleanly executed (and not, you know, drowned in a giant vat of chocolate, as a dozen Oomp-Loompas made up a song about it. THAT'S CALLED ACCESSORY TO MURDER, OOMPA LOOMPAS). No points.
2- OK. Red Bull versus coffee. I'd heard coffee had more actual caffeine in it, but I think (after some frustrating research of the kind where everyone on the net has an opinion but no actual knowledge) that Red Bull contains less caffeine, but instead contains more sugar plus Taurine, which is literally just caffeine by another natural source. Here's the most informed quote I could get, if you're interested:
"A can of Red Bull actually contains less caffeine than a cup of coffee (approx 65-70% than that of a standard espresso shot). It relies on this caffeine to initiate an intial energy boost, which is then promoted by the amino-acids, non-complex carbohydrates, and vitamin B additives to sustain an 'energy-boost' for 2-3 hours (thats what Red Bull Gmbh say anyway). The sugars (27 grams) are used to promote a users endurance levels for this 2-3 hours. Comparatively, a regular can of Coke contains 40 grams of sugar! Interestingly, there is not one ingredient in a can of Red Bull, apart from the 80mg of caffeine, that is not found naturally within the human body (ie. taurine, glucoronolactone, nicinamide, etc.)." Source: Teh Internets
I'll call that a point each to Ben & Tim.
3- Find the fake Japanese soft drink!
A- Yoghurt flavoured Pepsi
B- "Become Bigger" breast-enlarging soft drink
C- "Curry Ramune" Curry & Lemonade soda
D- NEEDS liquid cheese drink
E- Unagi Nobori eel-extract soda
F- Carbonated birds-nest tea
Sorry lads, not even the Japs would drink carbonated birds-nest tea (the Chinese, on the other hand...) and yoghurt-flavoured Pepsi, or Pepsi White, is definitely real:
http://www.avclub.com/articles/taste-test-pepsi-white,2537/
No points. Which gives us a two-way tie that the judges are far too lazy to resolve, specially how they liked both the tie-breaker questions equally. I tried grabbing them individually by the lapels (that's all they wear, for some reason - lapels on a string around the neck) and screaming that there's very little point HAVING a tie-breaker question if you never use it. They mumbled something about Slash being a great prophet but that he HAD actually released a book containing his holy wisdom - e.g. Slash: The Autobiography - and not being sure whether Tim was making a joke about his favourite musical artist Mika or not. So, sorry, you'll just have to divvy up the Golden Buffalo Bill amongst yourselves somehow. The (normally) Esteemed judges were really getting around in the dressing gowns this week, because they also called it a tie for the Best Question Award. Just as I was reaching for the lapels again they pointed out that it was impossible to see daylight between the contenders for Best Ever High School Band Name, 'Spasm' and 'Intense Hammer Rage'. I realised they were correct, and the only possible option was to combine the titleholders into 'Spasm OF Intense Hammer Rage'.
So thanks to Tim & Ben for taking part regardless. Now it's time for the prizes, this week donated by the ABC, or "Auntie" as it is, for some reason, known.
Silver:
Your choice of the Square Window, the Round Window, or the Arch Window, and the infinite worlds of learning magic plus dodgy blue-screen effects they contain.
Gold:
Approve 6 programs of your choice, to be professionally made (budget constraints permitting) and screened for reals on the nations's fourth-favourite broadcaster! (NB- all new programs premiered at 1.30 AM on a Tuesday, cos that's how Aunty rolls, bitches.)
And now, Marjorie, the questions please, and don't wake up blackboard again because that motherfucker is IMPATIENT!
1.
Do you think Blackboard ever got shitfaced and woke up with things drawn on him that he had no memory of seeing? Possibly cocks? Did blackboard ever feel TRULY SAFE drinking with friends who owned chalk?
2.
Give an example of where you draw the line between shy and antisocial...
Shy:
Antisocial:
3.
Real question one:
Vegemite recently did something downright unAustralian and released a new version of their fine brown product. They ran a contest to invent a new name, picked a winner, printed it onto 500,000 jars, then realised everyone fucking hated it. So now it's back to the public again in another contest. What was the name that nobody liked?
4.
...and which name would you enter? (or have you entered, if you're Ben?)
5.
What's the best thing somebody could you spike your drink with?
6.
Real question two:
In 1781, the astronomer Herschel became the first man in the modern era to discover a new planet in our solar system, the mighty gas giant Uranus. What did he originally want to call it instead?
7.
Why did Mum never care who started it?
8.
As soon as we invent 3D virtual reality that actually works, what will be the first best-selling game which DOESN'T involve killing things or sweet, sweet poontang?
9.
Hit me with your top 3 unused 007 girlfriend names...
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10.
Real question three:
I don’t want to upturn lives out there in Quiz-Town, yet I've come across terrifying BUT TRUE news about a prototype KFC product, born in the Chickenology labs under Mount Colonel, and currently being trialled in the Midwest of America. Seriously. It's called the KFC Double Down Sandwich. I'll give you one point for every correct component you can name... (NB- this question was placed at the end for convenience reasons - I didn't want you to have to write seven more answers before going to the nearest KFC and MAKING DEMANDS)
And los breaker del tie...
If humans were as varied in size, shape, colour and proportion as, say, dogs or birds are (so you would see, e.g. 20-foot-tall blue dudes with enormous necks walking down the street) would there be more racism or less?
Thanks for playing, peeps! Have a good week and a fun weekend.
T-Dawgz-999.mpeg |
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