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2009-09-24 |
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The Quiz That Should Not Be - 23/9/9 |
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By: Tombo The Merciful |
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Hey there!
Wednesday again, another week passes, Channel Ten loads the dumpster with pilot programs and commissions another 17 variations of a show where people dance badly in front of other people. An intern suggests a TV show with scripts; his corpse, once extinguished, is thrown into the pit with those of the other heretics. Meanwhile the weather gets gradually better, two weeks' holidays approach at the speed of a glacier's granny, and the world spins closer and closer to the maw of Galactus, planet-devouring entity from the universe next door. Look out for Galactus on SBS News in weeks to come (Channel 10 are featuring Celebrity Dance Your Cancer Into Remission instead).
So, given that we're all about to be eaten (by Galactus), why not have a look at the answers for last week?
-In martial arts training, belts originally began as white but were not washed as they were considered to be repostories of 'ki', or life force. Thus, after years of training your belt, like Ross's underpants, would eventually end up black. And a point to him for knowing that.
-In the album version of the song "Money For Nothng", Mark Knopfler uses the word "faggot" three times, as seen here:
"The little faggot with the earring and the makeup
Yeah buddy that's his own hair
That little faggot got his own jet airplane
That little faggot he's a millionaire"
Now Mark, that's no way to talk about Rob Thomas. Let's give the Knopf the benefit of the ironic doubt and quickly move on with a point to Tim and Ben.
-As of 2009, the USA owns 68% of the global arms manufacturing game. You'll be reassured to know that, despite the global economic meltdown (which they caused, in case you forgot), their slice of this particular pie is now worth US$37 billion, up from US$25 billion the year before. A point to Ross for being closest.
And that makes Rossco the winner this week, even before deducting 2 points from Tim's score for using "meh" twice. Ross gets the Golden Castle Gresykull Action Playset, and may it provide many hourse of fun aged 4+. The esteemed panel, after much deliberation and doing bongs in the back of a pnael van, also saw fit to give Ross the Best Reply gong for this one here:
Do you ever worry that, if you went to Disneyland, you would assault the staff while yelling "WHAT KIND OF MICKEY MOUSE OPERATION IS THIS?!"
Yeah, I'd probably have a Minnie breakdown. I'd get pretty animated. Acting all goofy and shit. Because I'd be 'on ice'.
Yes look out for the Ben Cousins Ride at Disneyworld this summer. Thanks to all comers once again, now let's have a look at the prizes, which were this week kindly donated by me, cos I loves youse all.
Silver:
A bunch of old magazines - Q, Retro Gamer, Heavy Metal, Wizard, Next Generation, Vice. Lay those motherfuckers on the coffee table and stand well back from the door, lest you drown in the TSUNAMI OF LAY-DEZ.
Gold:
Everything I own. OK, it's not much...um...look I may have been a bit hasty there. How about...let's see here...eighteen, nineteen dollars...and thirty five. And a starland video card! OK I think there's about six bucks of overdue fines, but that still leaves you a hefty $13.35!
Quick, Marjorie, the questions!
1.
What's the best high school band name of all time?
2.
Delaying gratification is...
A- Good for the soul
B- Bad for the soul, good for the character
C- Depends how old you are
D- Communist. Go back to Russia, Vladimir!
E- Frankly unnecessary in today's world
F- A good way of not turning into Paris Hilton
G- Other
3.
Real question one:
Where do two-thirds of China's organ donations come from?
4.
Is it just me being Captain Politically Correct, or does Family Guy contain an unnecessarily high average number of rape jokes per episode?
5.
Is it dumber to be jealous of somebody for something they've earned through hard work, or for something they were born with, and why?
6.
Real question two:
Which contains more energy - a cup of coffee or a can of Red Bull?
7.
What's the least effective martial arts style ever made up, just then, by you?
8.
If you banned bragging like a five year old, what would rappers rap about?
9.
If you could control your own endorphin supply (e.g. turn off pain when you wanted), how long would it take for you uto accidentally die, and what would be the circumstances?
10.
Real question three:
Which one of these Japanese soft drinks am I making up...
A- Yoghurt flavoured Pepsi
B- "Become Bigger" breast-enlarging soft drink
C- "Curry Ramune" Curry & Lemonade soda
D- NEEDS liquid cheese drink
E- Unagi Nobori eel-extract soda
F- Carbonated birds-nest tea
And the tie-breaker:
Describe your favourite little-known prophet, and tell us why he never quite broke into the mainstream like Buddha or Jesus...
Thanks for playing chaps! Have a good week!
Tombo The Merciful |
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